Can you think of a time in your life when you had a challenge or problem that made you feel stuck…and then you went to visit a good friend. In the midst of a fun visit with your friend, you end up having a meaty discussion about your problem and somehow miraculously solve the issue. Your stress level drops significantly. It’s like everything “clicks” and the situation feels so much easier.
That’s essentially what Energy Coaching feels like. Of course it’s a bit more complicated than that, but to describe in overly simplistic terms – it’s basically a fun, productive and stress reducing conversation with some energy work thrown in.
Maybe you have fun and productive, problem-solving conversations all the time. (Lucky you! Can I meet your friend?) Or, maybe you don’t.
If that’s the case, might I suggest Energy Coaching? It helps relieve stress, work through problems, and bring more clarity to your goals.
Energy Coaching is basically two things: #1 – A fun, productive conversation #2 – Energy balancing.
Together they bring about something amazing…which is…#3 – YOU FEELING GREAT and aligned on all levels (physically, emotionally and energetically) with what you want.
Allow me to explain this more fully:
#1 – A Fun and Productive Conversation
The first thing you’ll do in an Energy Coaching session is sit down and talk with your coach for a bit. She will introduce you to the energy kinesiology/muscle testing we use in Coaching so you have a mini education on what it’s like and how it works. Then she’ll ask you something like, “What could be better about your life?” And you’ll respond by sharing a stressful aspect of your life that you’d like to improve. No matter how big or small the issue, it’s all welcome in Energy Coaching. Perhaps the hardest part is figuring out what aspect of life you’d like to work on. In that case, here’s a list of some of the struggles that can be tackled with Energy Coaching:
- Feel more confident about speaking in front of groups – save your shirts from armpit sweat!
- Cure the laziness that sets in every time you say your going to organize your garage.
- Allow the grief of a loss or failure to pass through, instead of sinking you.
- End your obsession with Ben and Jerry’s ice cream.
- Let go of anger and resentment toward someone who has wronged you.
- Find the courage or clarity you need to leave or find peace with a job or relationship that isn’t working anymore.
- Reduce negative self talk – blaming and shaming yourself for everything.
- Insert your idea here!!
Who doesn’t want to clear stuff like that?
Once you’ve shared the stressful topic you want to work on, your coach will ask you lots of questions about the stress, such as: What is most stressful? How is the issue affecting different areas of your life? How would you feel if the stressful issue were resolved? etc. Once you’ve talked for a while (maybe 20-40 minutes) your coach will start to guide you toward setting a goal that you would like to reach. The goal is stated in the positive and present tense and will relate directly to the stress you’ve been talking about. Example: “Other people’s driving irritates me so much” could lead to this goal statement: “I feel calm and safe when I’m driving.”
It’s very likely that your goal will feel untrue. That means it’s a good goal because there’s stress to be balanced!
To be clear. Energy Coaching is different from advice, counseling or therapy, although it does incorporate some of those aspects. It’s not a psychic reading. We can’t tell you anything about other people (e.g. Is my ex husband gay?). We do not have an agenda. We don’t know what is best for your life. We believe that you know what is best for you, and we want to help you tap into that knowing.
#2 – Energy Balancing
Now that your goal is set, your coach will use energy kinesiology (muscle testing) to find which energy meridians (from traditional Chinese medicine) are affected by the stress you just discussed.
During this part of the session, you might be laying down on a massage table, sitting in a chair, or standing. It’s completely up to you and your comfort level.
Your coach will test many different muscles (a minimum of 14 on both sides of the body). Some muscles will lock/hold easily and others will unlock/not hold. The ones that don’t hold are an indication of where stress is being held in the body. We will use some energy/touch techniques, questions or metaphors that will “balance” or clear the stress around the issue.
Once your energy is “balanced,” the session is complete. (Balancing means that the muscles and meridians are brought to a more optimal or homeostatic state). Your coach will recheck all the unlocked muscles to make sure that all muscles are locked and all energy circuits are clear. A coaching session is 90 minutes, so there is enough time for talking and energy balancing.
#3 – You Feeling Great
Typically, when the session ends, you feel better about the stressful topic you came in with. You may also have new insights about your behavior & attitudes related to the topic, as well as a new perspective on how to proceed. As you return to your daily activities, you may notice that your feelings on the subject have shifted and more possibilities are open to you.
Some people notice that they feel better about the stressful topic immediately. Others notice it more as they return to their day to day activities because they feel less emotionally triggered by the stress.
A Real Life Example
Once I received a coaching session from Sara while I was a caregiver for someone post hip replacement. He was very cranky those first weeks after surgery and often said and did things that would trigger me emotionally. His tone, behavior and actions would make me freeze up, unable to respond. I felt scared, confused, and all of my communication skills would fly out the window. I shared my situation and feelings with Sara and eventually we set a goal and balanced the energy around my stress. From the session, I gained new insight that I was taking on his suffering more than necessary.
Right after the coaching session I had to get back to my patient. As soon as I walked in the room, his tone, expressions and words told the story of his anger at my lateness and apparent disregard for his hunger. I briefly paused, then threw my hands in the air, smiled big and said matter-of-factly “Well, nothing we can do about that now! What would you like to eat?” While fixing food in the kitchen, I was taken aback by my new response. Normally, I would have been standing there, frozen, no words to say, apologizing or making excuses, feeling guilty and angry at the same time. My thoughts ran something like this: “Wow. What a difference! It had to be from the Energy Coaching session. That crap really works! How does it do that? It was so easy! I just talked about it and set a goal and poof!”
In the days and weeks after that I noticed other changes. I felt different about certain things and I reacted differently. I felt more confident about how to navigate my challenges.
Since then I have had many more coaching sessions, and I have noticed over and over again the post-session changes in myself. I have come to expect it. A commonplace miracle if you will. On my morning walks I notice how much lighter my thoughts are than they were a year ago. I wonder, what will I be like next year? In five years?
What About Your Growth
What about you? Do you like the trajectory you are on?
If you are looking for real growth and change, Sara, Joyce and I look forward to becoming the friend you visit from time to time to bring clarity and stress relief to the challenges of your life.
FOOTNOTE: So now you have a sense of what happens in an Energy Coaching session, but you might be confused or curious about what energy kinesiology is and how it works. If so, stay tuned for our upcoming blog post What the Heck is Energy Kinesiology? coming February 20th!